Quotes

DM: The hobgoblins are all wearing full chainmail.
William: We’re all going to get chainmail!
Cerlyn: They have an 18 AC.
William: We’re all going to die!

= = =

William: Gerty is disguised as a hobgoblin, but do we think he’s a hobgoblin, or do we realize he’s really our friend?
Gerty: You were standing next to me when I cast that spell, so you know it’s me.
William: Was I? Oh, that helps.
Gerty: Though to be fair you’re still not sure I’m your ‘friend’…

= = =

Cerlyn: I don’t think they’re going to let us in there.
William:Why not?
Cerlyn: They kicked Simms out and all she did was ask for help.
William: Well they can’t technically kick us out until they let us in.
DM: That is a fair point.

= = =

William: I use minor illusion to make my clothes look cleaner than Gerty’s.
Gerty: I roll to disbelieve.
Cerlyn: I roll my eyes.

= = =

William: I will be happy to perform for the cost of my room.
DM: Ah, an entertainer? Well, well, well, what kind of performances do you do?
Gerty: Interpretive slam poetry.

= = =

DM: Are you guys interested in doing some “clandestine shopping”?
Gerty: Funny you should mention it, “clandestine shopping” is how I ended up on a prison island in the first place.

= = =

Gerty: How do you spell ‘courier’?
DM: C – O – U – R…
Gerty: Wait! I wasn’t ready.
Cerlyn: C-O-U-R-I-E-R.
William: Can you use it in a sentence?
Cerlyn: His curry was delicious, but mine was courier.

= = =

DM: You follow the sound of clanking metal to the blacksmith. Chink! Chink! Chink!
Gerty & Osoyawuk: That’s racist!

= = =

DM: Your story is pretty far-fetched. Do you have any evidence?
Gerty: No, but I do have a deception skill.

= = =

DM: Rex is a strange town. Very weird. If you ever get the chance to visit…don’t.

= = =

DM: I don’t remember the name of this town. It’s Stone something or something Stone.
Gerty: The Family Stone.
Cerlyn: Where Sly lives.
Gerty: Stonehenge.
DM: Great, that’s going to be stuck in everybody’s heads now. It’s not Stonehenge.
Cerlyn: Estonia?
Gerty: Stone Cold Steve Austin?
Cerlyn: Aus-stone? Stone Cold Creamery?
Gerty: Hew! Hew Stone. Houston.
DM: Oh, right! It’s called “Rocks”.
Cerlyn: All those stone jokes, just wasted.
Gerty: That town is now Hew-Stone. We don’t care what you call it.

= = =

Gerty: So we’re going to Treebor to…lie to those people?
Cerlyn: We’re telling them that Karkark is coming. Which is true.
Gerty: Eh…
DM: He’s not comfortable with the truth. Can you lie it up a bit?
Cerlyn: Karkark is coming and he’s bringing a dragon with him?
Gerty: Too far. How about he’s coming and he’s bringing an army of goblins, hobgoblins and a harpy.
Cerlyn: Yeah, that’s all vaguely kind of true.
Gerty: Ah. The best kind of true.

= = =

William: I’m going to cast unseen servant to carry this water for me.
Gerty: You’re going to cast it every hour as a ten minute ritual? How about if I just cast Tenser’s Floating Disk. It lasts 8 hours.
William: Oh, do you have the components to cast that?
Gerty: It doesn’t matter, I don’t even know that spell.

= = =

Gerty: We should go check out that sea cave.
Cerlyn: You want to cliff dive down there? Cause we don’t know how deep that water is.
Gerty: We could just climb down there using Athletics or an Acrobatics check.
William: Like you have either one of those skills.
Gerty: Hey, I’m an elf.
William: So you’re trained in Acrobatics?
Gerty: Oh, I wouldn’t go that far.

= = =

William: We give the priest as decent a burial at sea as we can.
Cerlyn: By which he means we toss the priest off the pier into the water.
William: Well, we’ll say a few words…
Cerlyn: Sea ya.

= = =

Osoyawuk: These prisoners are…salvageable.
Gerty: They’re salvage?
William: We can use them to carry our stuff!
Gerty: How would I mark that on my character sheet?
William: “Seen” Servant.

= = =

Gerty: I throw the priest in the ocean as reverently as I can given that less than half an hour ago I was considering eating his corpse.

Quotes

Isolation Island eholding2001 ToddBailey